There was a young boy who was obscenely large. No one liked to look at him because he was so fat! He was 2 years old, smart as your average 30 year old man, and somehwere around 220 lbs.
And he would waddle.
Which people hated.
Cause all the popular fat kids would roll.
In any case.
Everytime he would waddle by, some one would cry "Dough BOOOOOOOOOY!" And everyone would shield there eyes. Becaues of this, it became really easy for this kid to steal things.
Anyway.
So he liked to steal things cause nobody could see.
And he decided to take advantage of that.
But one day he took it way to far.
He tried to steal the shoes of peoples feet!
And so he would waddle, and hug the persons leg. And the feeling of so much fat on a persons leg was rather disturbing.
and so the person would turn into a bat and fly away.
But suddenly.
Everyone was turning into bats!
And so this kid was like
"Now its my turn!"
So he journeyed to the highest cliffs of the U.S. to attempt his transformation.
He stood at the edge.
Thought about cookies and fattening donuts
and yelled into the sky:
"NEVER BEFORE HAS ANYONE..." Then he realized those were all the english words he knew.
So he just jumped.
from 80,000 ft high.
Hoping he would reach a safe landing, cause he didnt know how to transform yet.
He was biting his toes! Pretending to tickle his sisters nose!
And then he realized.
the oreos he ate the the night before...
They were fat free!
This was so heart aching to this boy.
And I Think ill give him a name.
His name was Antonio Sanchez deMucho Sancosi.
And as he was falling,
He tore his heart out, (or at least the fake stuffy one that he shoved up his shirt every day)
And yelled at it "NEVER BEFORE HAS ANYONE!!!!!!!!!" And shoved it back in his shirt, and grabbed on the cliff that he had fallen 40,000 feet down, so he was basically holding on to a rocky wall 40000 feet above the ground.
He was worried.
So worried.
Like, really worried Kiki.
The worriedness of him made him grow more worried.
Which worried him for being worried about being worried.
And this began to happen over and over again.
Until he was worried 8 times.
But then.
He overcame his fear...
So this kid overcame his fear.
He somehow rolled up the wall and made it back to the surface of the cliff, and began waddling home.
But before he got home
he would knock on everydoor
and tell the only joke he knew!
"Never before?"
and then people would say "What?"
and he would say "HAS ANYONE!"
and he would laugh until the people slammed the door in his face.
Eventually he thought that was actually a good thing.
Cause he was so full of himself and his joke, that surely good things had to come to pass because of ti.
it.
Anyway.
He made it home
and his family was gone.
There was a note on the table
but he couldnt read it.
cause he only knew four words.
So he sat down./
And cried about his family being gone.
He wanted to tell his joke so bad.
But then his family got home
...they were just grocery shopping.
And his mom came up to him and said "Son, you are really overweight. Its about time you overcame all this jiggle honey pickle. Cause you know, there are a lot of people in this world that like to eat dat shuga stuph, and befo they know wha git em, they turn into bats. And sonny boy, if you eva turn into one of dem bats...."
she stood up and left.
His mom was a mystery to him.
Her accent would constantly change as she spoke.
But he knew what she was saying when she spoke that way.
Anyway.
Antonio turned into a whale spirit.
Cause he knew that whale spirits easily touch souls.
And he flew around to all over the earth
blessing people with peanuts and many other things that they were all allergic to
and thus ended the planet of Zilutyalk.
O.O
