Stripes = way more emotional breakdowns than she's used to. I used to not get those, but lately they've come pretty often. My guess is it's a combination of lack of sleep, lack of food, hormones, and just life in general. Whatever it is, it's weird. These breakdowns only last - at the most - half an hour. When they happen I just feel totally hopeless and that almost nothing will help. For those of you who are around when this happens, I apologize. But, you've been such a great help to me. I'd be even more of a wreck without you! I love you all, I really do.
I had one of those breakdowns today. I get frustrated with my mistakes very easily, and I've been making a lot of them - specifically on the rifle. It seemed every time I tried- I'd mess up, and I didn't know how to fix it. But, as one of my good friends [who happens to be very good at spinning] said: You don't become an expert over night. Ironically enough, I did just learn this stuff yesterday, so that saying was very much applicable. I still felt very very hopeless, and I wanted to cease to exist. Not a happy feeling, not at all. However, I just needed some pep-talk type stuff. Thanks a TON to Sync, Jess, and Jecca - I feel better now.
Interestingly, I find myself having more dedication after every time it seems hopeless. I didn't know any more dedication could fit in me! But, it can, 'cause I feel it. And this is why I'm sticking to Colorguard, I just have such a passion for it. I have another person to say thanks to. This person suggested I join guard in the first place, and I wouldn't have something I love so much if it weren't for him. Thanks John!
I laugh at myself for being such a mess. But, I'll get the hang of these silly breakdowns soon. And, I'll get better at spinning, with all this over-the-top dedication. Then I'll be completely and extremely happy! Woohoo!
No comments:
Post a Comment