Because Lemons had to leave.... [here are his words again]
ok then....im probably gonna restart it...cant remember what was happening. ill send my magical left shoe into the past to change the history of your name. :D
Back when Genghis Khan held the thrown of Mulan, in China, many legislators figured that if Mulan was a disney movie in the far future, then blu - ray dvd's would be released in the year 2006. These wise men began consulting a alternative. They needed a new emperor or blu - ray dvd's would cause scientists to make cookies out of plastic, and cookies cannot be destroyed.
The first legislator of the 5, remembered Frodo, who had destroyed a ring. Yes, a massive one. It was golden brown and had chocolate along the edges....and SPRINKLES! The legislator spoke of the donut being destroyed.
"wait boys! Frodo destroyed the donut!"
They ignored his reply.
Now you are probably wondering why this was so important. Who cares if Frodo severely over cooked a donut? well off of the ash of that donut was spawned Genghis khan, who was the current emperor. The legislator, who well call Bob, Figured that if they threw Genghis Khan into a huge firey pit, maybe Cuttle-fish would spawn out of his nostrils, and his kidneys would be renewed.
He spoke once again.
"Cuttle fish is to nostrils as genghis Khan is to donut!"
all the legislators looked at Bob, and they began to cry, exclaiming the words, ITS TRUE!!! But bob comforted the terrified men.
"So therefore we cannot throw Genghis into the fire! Cuttlefish are much too dangerous. We must feed him endless cookies to show him that cookies may not be destroyed, and that something else will become the most powerful candy in the universe!!!!!" and everyone cheered for him.
Later taht night they all got togeth, each holding a bag of cookies, each bag filled with 56 cookies exactly.
"He'll never know what hit him." said bob, sneaking through the palace door.
"Who goes there?'' a guard had caught bob in his tracks.
"oh its just a helpless citizen! I am only here until i jettison this food supply to the emperor!" Bob covered himself.
The guard ran after him. Bob turned around and shoved a pancake into the guards mouth, and the pancake contained a heavy dose of novacane, which made the guard vvery ill.
Anyway, Bob made it to the emperors room, after using a total of 47 pancakes on 23 sumo wresters and 24 guards. He found Genghis Khan sleeping like a baby. He was extrmely cute when he was sleeping. when he was awake though, he would feed his slaves dental floss. Poor slaves!
He took one of the cookies and shoved it into Genghis Khans mout, and began doing it rapidly. When he finished all 300 something cookies, Genghis Khan was still sleeping. So then he decided to use his last pancake on him.
When he fed the pancake to Genghis, Nicholas Cage came out from under the bed. he grabbed Bob's legs, and sweeped him to the floor. Nicholas stood. He looked at Bob and said, "I am not a nutcracker."
Bob stood. "well thats good news." he said, Wiping his nose. He then licked Nicholas in the face. "Toodles!" he said waving goodbye, and jumping out the window. unfortunately he forgot about the flights of stairs he had to climb up to get to that room in the first place. He Broke his poor legs, and crawled back home. He dreamed about a burrito when he slept that night. A burrito so great, Jim carrey would have to take TWO BITES to eat it. Jim carrey sunk the titanic.
Anyway Bob decided to ask Genghis of the Burrito. For Genghis was extremely wise. Genghis invented nothing though. he didnt do anyhting. He was interested in Windex, and it destroyed his life.
Bob set up an appointment to see Genghis, and arrived three days later. Why did it take him three days? well Genghis was passed out from eating so many cookies and eating a panckae full of novacane, and there fore....he was in his coma.
When he saw Genghis, Bob fell to his knees in horror, and laughed for a good amount of time, and Genghis laughed with him. Unfortunately the laughing caused Genghis' Pancreas to shoot up into his arteries, and defuse his liver which caused a weird form of brain cancer. (dont ask how your pancreas causes brain cancer) and caused Genghis to die on the spot. Genghis had nine lives.....actually more.
But Bob never got to talk to him. Bob became depresesd, and so he went to the post office. But when he left the palace, The village had been over run by Krispy Creme Donut Trucks. Bob was overwhelmed. He wasnt watching the other legislators and that caused them tyo order 6789797 dozens of donuts...from Krispy Kreme, who back then raised tobacco, but didnt put it in there donuts, for a refreshing donut. :D
So everyone began buying these donuts....and the were very scrumptous. and absolutely ginormous. :D
So when Bob went to go try one....he licked it. he loved the flavor....so he licked it again. but he came upon a curse with his licking. With every ten licks, his brain forced him to say the word "Partridge."
So a man walked up to him and asked him for his name. Bob replied...well, bob.
"Bob - who?" the man asked back.
Bob licked the donut and replied, "Partridge."
The pacific ocean changed into chocolate for 6 seconds and everyone was in awe. for a new name was born.
Make sure The Muffin knows the story of her last name! :D
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